ARE YOU STUCK, LOST, CONFUSED....?
Has 2016 started the way you hoped it would?
Do you feel excited and ready for an incredible year ahead?
Are you feeling eager and excited to start each new day?
Sometimes, even when we really want something badly, our dreams, ideas and motivation don’t seem to be working together as lovingly as they should be and we end up feeling that we are getting nowhere.
Let’s take a look at what is happening when we are feeling stuck, lost or confused and what we can do about it.
When you are experiencing these things, you might not know exactly what it is, but there’s something that just doesn’t feel right. And, it’s easy to stay stuck in the dissatisfaction of ‘not feeling right’ because we don’t always know exactly what the feelings are or where they come from. Also we often have no idea how to change them.
We get caught up in worrying about figuring it all out and having all the answers. When we don’t know how to change things, we convince ourselves that there’s no way or it’s too hard, so we just carry on being bored, frustrated or unfulfilled.
Many of us know there’s something more. We don’t know what the “something more” is, but we can hear it calling to us.
We’re ready to feel aligned, purposeful, and driven, but we just don’t know how to do that. Frustrating eh!!
Alternatively you might be already taking action but it's not working, so you continue to feel stuck because your situation is not improving.
Some examples of being stuck could be:
Trapped in a job that doesn't interest or excite you
Stuck in your business, procrastinating and unsure what direction to go forward
Confused and unsure in your relationship but not sure why or what to do
Stuck with health, energy or weight issues, knowing what you should do but just not doing it
Why do we stay in these places of feeling stuck and confused ?
This happens for many reasons. Some of the common ones are:
Fear - Often we remain trapped in fear based thinking and limiting beliefs based on stuff that has happened in the past.
Resistance Sometimes there can be underlying resistance to change so it remains easier to stay where you are and do nothing. This is usually a sign that you are out of alignment with yourself, your core values and your true essence.
Conflicting values You don’t have clarity around what's really important to you and why it is important. Sometimes when we are stuck our values are in direct conflict with what is actually happening in our life.
Confusion Not knowing and understanding yourself well and so not knowing what it is you really want.
Focussing on how things are instead of how you want them to be ‘Where your attention flows your energy goes’. If your attention is constantly focused on problems, what you don't want and what is not working for you, then that is what you will continue to experience.
Reacting to life instead of responding to it When we are numb and unaware of our emotions we are trapped in reactive emotional states that keep us stuck. It’s easy to stay stuck and trapped in a vicious cycle that continues to bring us more of the same.
So, what can we do to get Un-Stuck, Un-confused and Un-overwhelmed?
It takes a bit of time to really look at and understand yourself, what makes you uniquely you, what your real core values are, and understanding and recognising your own special talents before you can get out of one pattern and get into the habit of doing something new.
New habits need to be practiced and after a while they become second nature, experts say it takes 21 days… I would say it takes a bit longer than that!
Adopt the attitude that there is no rush. It’s just life and there is nowhere to get to, no time limit to do it within.. Ok… sometimes it’s necessary but not always!
To practice a new, healthy habit……. the most important piece it to keep reminding yourself of it because…..believe it or not in the busyness of life, you forget!
Here’s a few ideas to remind yourself of a new habit you are trying to create:
Journal about it every day
Write yourself a card to remind yourself and tack it to your bedroom mirror
Create a poster and hang it in your office
Set reminders on your phone
These are simple suggestions and tools that are there to constantly keep reminding you during the day, what it is you want to achieve. Lots of people think this stuff is too simple and they don’t believe it works, they don’t want to do stupid exercises like this!
The real answer to this problem is, don’t let your mind talk you out of stuff because…….. Your mind is the big problem!
By the way, I am holding an awesome coaching (and other yum stuff!)retreat in Tauranga the last weekend in Feb where we will look at the above issues and more in greater depth.
Come and join us and get serious about creating positive, sustainable change in YOUR life! www.balancelifecoaching.co.nz/retreats2016